Live... For Yourself

 

Venkatesh and Suman are brothers. 

Venkatesh is a retired professor with house in Benz Circle Vijayawada and receives good Pension. Urmilla is his wife and his children are settled in the USA.

Suman retired from a normal government post. Suman's wife Malathi retired as a School Principal. They have a small house in Dilsukhnagar Hyderabad. Their children stay in Hyderabad separately.

Malathi who stays in Hyderabad called her co-sister Urmilla who stays in Vijayawada.

Malathi: I am coming to Vijayawada for my nephew's wedding. I will come 2 days early to stay at your place. It's been long time I have stayed for couple of days with you.

Urmilla: Yeah ! His Mother has sent the wedding card and called me too. How about your husband?

Malathi:  He will come with the bridegroom. I will not be able to stay after the marriage as I need to return to Hyderabad for post-marriage rituals. So, I am planning to come before the marriage. I will come from the railway station, don't bother to come.

Urmilla: Okay. Call me after boarding the train.

Malathi called Urmilla after she boarded the train. After getting down from the train, she came down to Urmilla's house in auto. It was around 6:30 in the morning. Urmilla was sweeping the corridors. Urmilla took Malathi inside and Malathi was shocked to see the house inside. There were bundles of clothes on the Sofa in hall and newspapers bundle on the coffee table. Dining table chairs are full of remains of food particles. Usha pulled up a dining chair, cleaned it and asked Malathi to sit and went to Kitchen for making Coffee. She gave coffee to Malathi and completed her sweeping, hurriedly put clothes in washing machine and started cooking for lunch.

Urmilla was looking like a maid as she was wearing faded clothes and scattered hair.

As Urmilla was taking out vegetables from the fridge:

Urmilla: We will have lunch soon, so will not prepare any breakfast.

Malathi nodded even though she was hungry and asked for Venkatesh.

Urmilla: He went for walking. On the way, he told he will go to apartment to get some repair work done. He might come in an hour.

Malathi: Let me cut the vegetables. You go for bathing.

Urmilla's maid has come by the time she finished her bathing. Urmilla was behind the maid and complaining about not getting the work done. The maid retorted saying that this work is more than enough for the salary getting paid.

Malathi felt that Urmilla was doing half of the house work.

After the maid left,

Malathi: Why are you doing all the work? You should get it done with the maid.

Urmilla: They want thousands of salary to do all work. We are only two of us, so it shouldn't be so much work. It feels like exercise to me.

What Malathi observed in the 2 days stay at the house is - Urmilla calculates every penny, eating cheap food, storing new clothes inside and wearing old clothes, asking Venkatesh to travel in bus after having a car because of petrol cost. Malathi was confused if Urmilla's family is really in bad need of money.

Malathi asked Venkatesh on the first opportunity:

Malathi: Don't feel otherwise that I am asking, do you have any need of money?

Venkatesh: I was surprised you still didn't ask. By God's grace, we don't have any such difficulty. I will get around 1 lakh in pension, two flats which Urmilla forced to buy for children even though children are not interested, which give rent of 50,000. But when coming to spending, she says there will be requirement in future. She refuses to eat favorite food, going on vacations and enjoying life. Even though we are capable of hiring a cook and driver, she forces me to travel in bus. She is unable to do all the household work. But don't know what to do.

After 2 days of marriage, Malathi called Urmilla and invited to her house.

Urmilla also got bored of doing all the household work and Venkatesh was also thinking it has been long time since they travelled. They decided to go to Hyderabad.

As the train arrived at Hyderabad platform, Malathi's husband Suman was waiting on the Platform.

When they got down the train,

Suman: Welcome to Hyderabad. Malathi is waiting for you at the house.

Someone beside Suman was carrying the luggage of them. Venkatesh was worried that someone is taking their luggage and Suman told that he is our driver Ramu. Urmilla is shocked to know Venkatesh is having driver.

Venkatesh lived in a colony with full of trees and roads are good. Even though Malathi's house is small it looked beautiful.

Venkatesh: We came to your children's marriages, house looks new, did you make any changes?

Suman: Nothing brother. Regular Maintenance and painting every 5 years.

Urmilla is thinking when they have painted their house last time. It's been 15 years and repairs have been pending since long. As a result, the house looks worn out.

When they entered the house, it felt good. Even though there were less items, they were neatly arranged. Dining table is arranged with plates and glasses.

Malathi came from inside and asked Venkatesh and Urmilla to get freshen up. Malathi showed the bathroom which was arranged with neat towels, new soap, new tooth brush and paste, a small napkin and freshner.

After fresh up, Venkatesh and Urmilla came to dining table and an woman aged 40 years was arranging idli, vada, chutney and sambar in plates and bowls. After having breakfast, the maid, Sunitha, brought coffee. Everyone took coffee and spent some time on the sofas talking.

Ramu also came and had tiffen with Sunitha. Suman asked Ramu to leave for the day as there is no other work for him. Ramu bid bye to Sunitha.

Urmilla was puzzled how they might be related. 

Malathi: Ramu is Sunitha's husband. He drives an auto. Whenever we require, he comes for car driving.

Sunitha completes her work and informs that she will come in the evening.

Urmilla asked funnily, "What will you do if Sunitha does all the work?"

Malathi: I became tired of household work, school and children for 30 years. Retirement should be complete retirement. I watch my favorite movies, study books, talk with friends and be how I like to be.

Urmilla: Since Sunitha is doing so much, do you pay more?

Suman: Sunitha and Ramu have 2 children. They are Malathi's students and study well. When Sunitha joined as maid, they were studying in government school as they can't afford private school. Malathi talked in her school and joined them for concessional fee. That fees is also paid by Malathi. Now, Sunitha's daughter completed her B.Tech and working for MNC. Her son is doing MBBS third year. Malathi still helps in his studies even now. Sunitha is paid monthly of 10 thousand rupees.

Urmilla: Ten Thousand! Does money grow on plants in your house?

Malathi: We grow all vegetables and fruits in our garden. Sunitha takes care of those. Sunitha does all the work from morning coffee, brings groceries, arranges washed clothes and of course, everything. When our children come over the weekend, Sunitha cooks their favorite sweets and snacks. If she doesn't come for one day, it feels a miss. She is part of our house. I can't tell you how much she helped us during children marriages and delivery times.

Ramu bought an auto. But he comes to us whenever we ask for driver. He doesn't ask money nor take if we give also. That is the reason, Sunitha is paid heavily.

Urmilla: What about your pension?

Malathi: We both get pensions less than Venkatesh but that is enough for us. We don't ask the kids, and we don't give them. They are earning and they have their own expenses. We have Medical Insurance and deposited the retirement corpus in a bank as an emergency fund. Whom should we give the money by saving more. Even if we give donations to organizations or orphanages, it might be for one day meal or half a dozen old clothes.

The maids who work in our houses are also poor. If we help them, their lives also can be improved. We can see the benefit right in front of our eyes. How much money can we save to give to children? Will there be any limit? We educated them. When they earn, they know the value of money.

Venkatesh: You are correct Malathi. It is better to help people in front of you than helping someone you don't know.

Having listened this conversation, Urmilla was in thought process.

After lunch, everyone took rest for sometime. Later, Sunitha came and prepared some snacks with Tea and started with dinner.

When Malathi came to Vijayawada, Urmilla couldn't spent time with Malathi as she was continuously juggling between works and couldn't sit properly and spent time.

Sunitha's children came home and his son was checking Suman's BP and Malathi explained how he helped to avoid a major heart stroke.

Malathi: Even though our children are here, they have their offices and works and they are confident that Sunitha's family will take care of us.

We also like to live here peacefully rather than disturbing our children's busy life. Whenever possible we go, or they come. It is better this way as long as we have strength.

Don't feel bad that I am telling. To give thousand more to the maid, you are doing all the household work and getting exhausted. You are wearing old clothes thinking that new ones get spoiled. When will you wear them? What if something happens to us, those new clothes are to be distributed to somebody.

You can afford to travel in car, but ask Venkatesh to travel by bus. He is also growing old, and reduced strength. You have a vegetable shop beside your house but since it is expensive, you send Venkatesh to distant market. How much expensive can be for 2 people? Neighborhood vegetable shop person also should survive, right!

Your children are settled in USA. They don't need the flats you purchased. You look after them till you live and later have to be sold out. So, why do you take so much tension about repairs. You can stay in that flat. If you feel it is too big for you, sell it out.

Instead of saving each and every penny and trying to give to children, you both lead a happy life, travel to your favorite places, give donations. It is a bliss to help such underprivileged children.

Recently, I have read an article by Mahesh Pai... 'Indian Senior Citizens are dying rich, but not living rich'. According to it, Indian Senior citizens even though have money are reluctant to spend, live poor and desire to give money to children after their death.

Saving and building assets is good and required but it is unwise if you are not enjoying the wealth and storing for future generations.

Give the assets to children. Retaining or selling the assets is up to them. Don't be a custodian to those. Lead a carefree life for lifelong. You first eat and donate to society. Not for someone's happiness - your satisfaction, happiness, live for yourself, spend your hard earned wealth for yourself.

Urmilla: You are right Malathi. Our children also say the same - 'We are sufficient with our income. You stay happily with the money you have.' It is difficult to change immediately, but slowly we will start spending for our own happiness.